You already had too many balls in the air. There were family/children, work, church and other worthy responsibilities to juggle every week. Now that you have taken on caregiving responsibilities for one or more of your elderly loved ones, you have no margin in your own life.
You are just sure one of those "balls" is going to drop in either your personal life or in your caregiving.
Are you more than just a little overwhelmed?
If yes, then take comfort in the fact that you are not alone.
In fact, a recent Next Avenue article, titled "The Sandwich Generation Juggling Act," employs "juggling" as a metaphor for caregiving.
Beginning jugglers start with one ball and slowly add a second. Then, they progress to three balls as their hand-eye coordination becomes accustomed to the rhythm. The real challenge comes with the addition of that fourth ball.
Among those who juggle, this fourth ball separates the players from the posers.
Caregiving is like juggling for a lot of Baby Boomers experiencing the Sandwich Generation.
And there are a lot of them - some 24 million Americans who are juggling their own care, family/children, work and caring for an elder loved one.
The article notes that many can handle the first three balls (me, family/children and work), but when that caregiving ball is added something has gotta drop.
Which one?
The "me" ball, of course.
So, what should you do?
Caregivers should take each ball of responsibility they are juggling and focus on ways to keep that ball moving in a fluid motion.
Juggling really only requires getting one ball into the air at a time, so here is a look at each one.
Ball 1: Family/Children.
Engage your children in the cause.
Children can become an essential ingredient in the care of an older grandparent. Most children, even as young as four or six, are tech-savvy unlike any generation before them. Asking a grandchild to connect with his or her grandparent via computer benefits both young and old when visiting in person is not convenient.
In addition, this online visit allows caregivers a needed break, maybe even a quick afternoon nap. This, in turn, can enhance recuperative sleep time, increase alertness, and an improve mood.
Ball 2: Work.
Many working caregivers are unaware that their employer may have elder care or caregiving services available to help juggle work and caring for an aging parent.
Also, remember that the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) was created with this type of caregiving situation in mind.
Almost all U.S. employers offer some unpaid leave to full-time employees. FMLA allows for eligible employees to receive 12 weeks of unpaid leave (26 weeks if caring for a covered service member or veteran). While FMLA provides job-protected leave, it does not require leave for the caregiving of a grandparent, in-law or sibling. The Act leaves that up to each state to define.
Ball 3: Caring for an Aging or Ailing Parent.
The most critical caregiving decisions deal with senior living options or in-home care and financial aspects. These include long-term care plan benefits, legal documents, medical billing, and insurance coverage. If you have issues with insurance claims and medical billing, speak with an elder law attorney experienced with elder care and senior issues.
Ball 4: Me.
What is a caregiver's Enemy Numero Uno? According to a recent study, that would streeeeessssss.
Consequently, stress relief is vital and can be found in caregiver support groups.
There are also online communities where caregivers create private groups, inviting family and friends to assist with tasks while the caregiver attends to other activities or gets a little respite.
Caregivers also have to acknowledge that finding "me time" is critical to maintaining the strength and energy need to juggle the other balls.
Self-care is the most important ball caregivers need to get up in the air and never let drop.
After all, if you do not take care of yourself, then you too will need caregiving.
[Photo Credit: "Early Egyptian juggling art" by User Oxymoron on en.wikipedia - Originally from en.wikipedia; description page is (was) here17:19, 15 September 2002 Oxymoron 250x135 (7,105 bytes) (early Egyptian depiction of juggling)17:11, 15 September 2002 Oxymoron 1024x555 (118,037 bytes) (early Egyptian juggling art). Licensed under Public Domain via Commons - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Early_Egyptian_juggling_art.jpg#/media/File:Early_Egyptian_juggling_art.jpg]
Remember: “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” When making your financial, tax and estate plans, do not go it alone. Be sure to engage competent professional counsel.
Reference: Next Avenue (December 16, 2015) "The Sandwich Generation Juggling Act"
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